I’m just like Sherlock Holmes. No, really. Whenever he was on a case he was completely immersed in it - didn’t sleep, didn’t eat, didn’t nuthin’. But between cases, he suffered from terrible bouts of ennui. He slouched about in Baker Street, injecting himself with cocaine and throwing pies at Dr Watson (okay, I made that bit up).

That’s me, that is. At the minute, I’m busy working away on my new website. I stay up late, I forget meals… I haven’t even got dressed for the last two days. This is what I’m like whenever I undertake a new project, but soon it will be finished and I’ll lapse into another bout of ennui. I won’t inject cocaine or throw pies at Dr Watson - well, maybe the occasional cherry bakewell - but mostly I’ll just spend a few days at a loose end, slouched in front of the telly and surfing the Net. Then I’ll have some crazy idea to build a pyramid out of ants or clone my toenail clippings or something, and the whole cycle will start again.

Got to go now. Must work on website.