When I'm drawing, pulling, hauling, lugging, tugging, trailing, training, wrenching, jerking, tease or tearing out my hair,
When my future's looking painful, dolorific, disagreeable, distasteful, unacceptable or grim,
Because I need a blasted, damnable, confounded or execrable, contemptible, despicable or loathsome synonym,
When I'm turning aged, elderly, diluvian or grey,
There's one person I can turn to; my darling Roget.
Roget! My inspiration!
(Or my muse, my god, my hero or my saint.)
Without you, I'd be in titubation!
(Or in trouble, torment, pain or dire
straits.)
Hooray! Roget!
For every chasm, crevice, chink, chip, chap, crack, cranny, cut or cleft
in my vocabulary,
There's no need to summon, congregate, convene, assemble, rally, marshal, muster, call or rendezvous the synonym constabulary.
If I haven't got a word that's proper, suitable, convenient, or pertinent, applicable, appropriate, auspicious, appertaining, apposite, or right, or apt,
I turn to you, absorbed, engrossed, enthralled, enthusiastic, ardent, avid, keen, athirst, agog, or zealous, fervid, fiery or rapt.
When I'm stuck for words to stammer, stress, speak, sound or state or say,
There's one person I can turn to; my beloved Roget.
Roget! Roget my dear!
(Or my darling, precious, angel or my sweet.)
Without you, my life would be unclear!
(Or unfinished, wanting, vague or incomplete.)
Oh yey! Roget!
If I can't remember, recollect, recall, evoke, elicit, wrest, expropriate
or finger the mot juste,
And my confidence needs stimulus, encouragement, support, a lift or succour, help, assistance or a boost,
If my tongue runs out of energy, efficiency, capacity or competence, facility or faculty or fuel,
And I don't want to look an ass, a dunderhead, a dolt, a dunce, a blockhead, halfwit, nincompoop or fool,
If I can't ponder, cogitate, think, ruminate or meditate all day,
There's one person I can turn to; my precious Roget.
Roget! You've saved my skin!
(Or my hide, my pelt, my casing, rind or peel.)
Without you what a pickle I'd be in!
(Or experience, endure, brave, bear or
feel.)
I say! Roget!
If I try to write an article, a discourse, disquisition or a lecture, paper,
speech or dissertation,
But my lexicon is cause for anger, testiness, annoyance, fury, outrage, insult, wrath or indignation,
Or if I compose a ballad, carol, chorus, chant or melody, a ditty, shanty, psalm, refrain or song,
But the scansion's unacceptable, amiss, askew, askance, defective, faulty, out, inaccurate or wrong,
If I get stumped, nonplussed, perplexed, lost, stuck or foiled when I script a play,
There's one person I can turn to; my treasured Roget.
Roget! You're like a dream!
(Or a fantasy, delusion, ghost or spook.)
Without you I would positively scream!
(Or shriek, shrill, squeal, shout or moan,
Or cry or sob or weep or groan,
Or roar or rumble, hoot or howl,
Or yap or snarl or sneer or growl,
Or blubber, bellow, bay or bawl,
Or whine or grumble, snort or call,
Or clamour, yell or holler, wail or whoop.)
Olé! Roget!
