The little Lord Jesus laid down his sweet head.

This innocent child would later go mad,

And claim quite sincerely that God was his dad.

The folk would believe him, so great was their need

To anthropomorphize their failure and greed.

With threats and untruths they would spread the good word,

Until all round the planet their lies had been heard.

This mighty mind-virus would breed like the plague,

Though the logic behind it was specious and vague.

To church every morning its victims would flit,

Like heroin addicts in need of a hit.

Two thousand years later a babe would be born

Whose grand revelation would herald a dawn.

Charles Darwin’s ideas would the Christians provoke,

Providing a powerful mind-antidote.

Beforehand, meanwhile, such lives we would lose,

As Romans killed Christians and Christians killed Jews.

I ask thee Lord Jesus, and this much I pray,

Don’t make the mistake that would cause this decay.

Alternately follow thy father and crawl

Back into the woodwork and knock up a stool.